Life, actually…

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MAKE YOUR DAY BETTER

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1. Never sniff your armpits in public.
2. Never sniff other people’s armpits in public.
3. Always wear shoes within Lego playrooms.
4. Never say “No problem.” Ever.
5. When you catch yourself frowning, smile broadly and hold on to it.
6. Remember, when someone is railing on you it means they are in pain, pain that you cannot readily identify. Don’t tell them you know they are in pain. Just listen intensely.
7. Come to a full stop at all stop signs. Assume that a law enforcement official is watching. Use wisely the time and money you save.
8. Limit yourself to two daily whines.
9. Never stare at cleavage.
10. Always say Good Morning or G’day.
11. Hold open the door for the person behind you. Don’t expect thanks but appreciate it when it happens.
12. Always thank the person who holds the door for you.
13. Leave the seat and lid down. Always.
14. When entering someone’s kitchen always ask, “How can I help?”
15. Dance first with the most ignored person in the room.
16. Never say “No thanks, I don’t drink,” when offered a drink. Simply smile and say “No thanks.”
17. Don’t proclaim that you are on a diet. Simply don’t eat what you do not wish to eat.
18. When trapped in an offensive political conversation back away and say, “Got to leave. I left my baby on the bus,” or something equally improvised. Do your part to avoid escalation.
19. If someone hands you a drink without asking, accept it. You can politely hold onto it without drinking.
20. Never assume you know the gender of a stranger. Pick your words carefully and politely.
21. Check the burners when you close the kitchen for the day. Always.
22. Tip generously except when asked for a tip.
23. When racing to a meeting or rendezvous always allot getting-lost time.
24. Show up two minutes early. Every time. Those who are tardy do not get fruit cup.
25. Ask permission before examining someone’s tattoo or tee-shirt slogan.
26. Do not tap dance on shag carpeting.
27. Don’t tiptoe in high heels.
28. Proudly say “It’s a pleasure for you to meet me,” for the 864^th time. Everyone else lost count long ago.
29. Ask permission prior to hugging.
30. Do not mock or tease others’ flatulence. Your turn will come.
31. Do not honk. The life you save may be yours.
32. Smile and wave. It counts.
33. Suppress your belch.
34. Behave as if you are being filmed and recorded.
35. Don’t roll your eyes. People can hear.
36. Allow your good feelings to emerge. Make them show.
37. Crank down your cranky.
38. Leave a good impression. People remember how you make them feel.
39. Only use four-letter words that do no harm, such as grin, help, love, give, heal, hold, save, ease, boon, play, kiss, nice, earn…
40. Notice who you hang out with. First-class people associate with first-class people. Second-class people associate with third-class people.
41. Do nice unto others as you would have them do nice unto you.
42. Pay attention to paranoid people. Sometimes the sky really is falling.

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These 42 ideas get me through the day. What gets you through the day?

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I hope you have the greatest of all possible days

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© Jim Reed 2022 A.D.

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