LEARNING WHEN TO BLINK | redclaydiary.com

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Life, actually…

LEARNING WHEN TO BLINK

I have lived during cold wars and hot wars, cold cuts and deep-fries, tornadoes and heat waves, during politics glorious and vicious, during hopeful times and monstrous periods, in hopefulness and despair. But if I blink at the correct rate, I still see mostly the good, the kind, the smiles, the tendernesses. To catch most of these wonders in the act, I have to blink at just the right times.

I call it Editing.

I spend a lot of time editing or deleting things that are difficult to deal with. For instance, political rants. I’ve heard as many political rants as I can absorb, so I edit them or store them out of sight. Enough is enough. If I’m not selective they will take up all the space in my brain, rent-free. I need that space for things more important than politics. Such as tending to family and friends and those in need, and sweet ideas.

Then there are the oft-repeated urban mythologies that lots of people believe and live by. Once I have vetted these mythologies one by one, I dispose of the ones that are simply that—mythologies. And I retain the ones that are actually true—not too many of these nowadays, but just enough to alert me to tread carefully through the briar patch. I don’t want to miss anything good.

And so on and so forth.

At times I feel that it requires a lot of effort to stay the course, to ignore the obstacles, to navigate safely the troubled waters. But I also feel that if I succumb to these unholy distractions I will become someone who is not Me.

I keep on testing those waters to make sure I am paying attention to the kindnesses that must be initiated and perpetrated, that must sweep aside everything that endangers the good will hunting that is worthy of my time.

Did I say it is easy, this do-gooder path I have selected for myself?

No way.

But Doing Good the hard way sure beats Doing Bad the easy way. Less stress, less guilt, less atonement, less glancing over my shoulder.

And some days, the best way to be true to myself is simply to get the heck of the way and not block the view for other do-gooders. Some days it is best for me to shut my mouth and allow others to say things both profound and ridiculous.

On those lips-pursed days I learn things, things both useful and frightening.

Today I think I’ll do a bit of expounding aloud, then close down the preachy sounds and spend the rest of the time listening and/or avoiding.

Avoidance can work wonders, especially when coping skills flounder and flop.

For the time remaining, I will endure roadblocks, rants, potholes, traffic cones, icebergs, sour grapes, sour gripes, missing-crust finger foods, endless barking, newspapers hiding within thorny bushes, notices of intent, incessant car alarms, bad breath, come-ons, come-backs, sales spiels, white lies, nervous laughs, sucky mosquitoes, sulky subteens, sticky handshakes, snooty walk-bys…

For the time remaining, I will cherish spontaneous laughter, tiny good deeds, unrequested thank-you notes, babbling babies, pretty hair following the breeze, gratuities, thank-yous, smiley smiles, jokes at no-one’s expense, good listeners, people who actually pay attention, and those who stop to gaze upward in awe…

It is possible that the day may not be as bad as I imagine. It is possible this day will turn out to be almost like fun