SO TELL ME HOW TO DO IT

HOW TO ORGANIZE A BOOK STORE

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Want to know the right way to organize a book store?

So do I.

Only, I know that, so far, I’ve learned from experience and from other armchair experts, a hundred ways not to organize a book store.

1.     You can arrange all the books by color. This would please the customer who insists that she wants oversized old children’s nursery books, but only if they fit in with the color scheme of her expectant daughter’s baby-to-be room. I do my best to help, and she seems pleased with the results.

2.     You can arrange all the books by size. Years ago, the Salvation Army Thrift Store book section manager did just that. The books were shelved by size. It took me years to realize that he was an adult illiterate—that he, by his own admission, could not read a word. This obviously qualified him for the job. I encouraged him to take an adult reading course, but have no way of knowing whether he took the advice.

3.     You can arrange the value of the books by weight. Many’s the time I’ve taken a stack of books to a flea market dealer to be priced and bagged. He carefully holds each volume in his hand, testing its heft and size, before giving me a price. Heavier books are more expensive than light ones.

4.     You can arrange them alphabetically, but this often backfires. For instance, if you are a customer looking for all books about Marilyn Monroe, it would take you a long time to find them in the show biz bio section, because they would be spread throughout the alphabet. Or you can arrange the books by the name of the subject of the bio—mainly, placing all Marilyn Monroe titles together, regardless of author or heft or color or size. This backfires when someone asks for all books by Norman Mailer, for instance. You’d have to go to many different sections of the store to find them all—since he wrote books about all kinds of subjects, including Marilyn Monroe.

 5.     You can arrange books by series name—for instance, placing all Pollyanna books together, but in this and many other cases, the Pollyanna books were written by more than one author…if you were looking for all books by one Pollyanna author, you’d again have to scurry about the store a long time to find them.

6.     You could arrange books by geographic location, but this can get complicated, too…

     Anyhow, you catch the drift.

     Next time you’re looking for a specific book at Reed Books and notice me running about, looking in different sections, you may be more tolerant. An example: “I’m looking for Ray Bradbury books.” Well, Bradbury writes in practically every genre, so where do you look? His enormous lifetime output is only ten percent science fiction/fantasy. He also writes grand opera, poetry, plays, architectural columns, mysteries, autobiography & biography, children’s books and science commentaries, to name a few. I know where they are in the store, but it may take me some time to make a stack for you to peruse.

     Go ahead—make a better book store, one that’s perfectly arranged so that you can find anything instantly. If you can also invent a backpack or purse in which you can locate exactly what you want at the push of a button, you could make a bunch of money. But that’s in the science fiction genre, isn’t it? Where would you file the instructions?

 Let me know

(c) Jim Reed 2010 A.D.

www.jimreedbooks.com

HI, MOTHERS OF THE WORLD

 GOOD MOTHERS

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Sunday afternoon was Mother’s Afternoon. I dined with a maybe-someday- mother (granddaughter Becky) and Becky’s mother, Paula and Paula’s mother, June…and assorted fathers and fathers-who-may-someday-be. Later, I saw our neighbor, Katie, on the occasion of her first Mother’s Day as a mother, talked with another maybe-someday-mother (granddaughter Jessica), and with two current mothers, wife Liz and daughter Margaret, plus neighbor Robert, who’s about to marry a maybe-someday-mother, and I heard the musical voices of other someday-mothers and current-day mothers, and I thought about all the mothers I’ve known who are no longer around but ever present in memory most precious.

And I thought about all the kinds of mothers there must be in our town, including motherless mothers, mothers who’ve lost their children, mothers whose children have been taken from them, mothers of mothers, absentee mothers, mysterious mothers, mothers who are always there, stepmothers,  

adoptive mothers, adopted mothers, mothers in name only, clueless mothers,  

clumsy mothers, mothers we wish we had known better, mothers we know only too well, highfalutin’ mothers, humble mothers, welfare mothers, imprisoned mothers, hugging mothers, distant and cool mothers, dream mothers, dreamy mothers, mothers we would give anything to see again,  

creative mothers, mothers who do what they can do, just for us, brilliant mothers, caretaker mothers, sacrificing mothers, storybook mothers, protective mothers, biological mothers, test-tube mothers, guardian mothers,

only-in-their-imagination mothers, good-pal mothers, uplifting mothers,

grandmothers, great grandmothers, mothers both great and grand, foster mothers, stand-in mothers, well-meaning mothers, wanna-be mothers, to-be mothers, long-gone mothers, faraway mothers, gentle mothers, good example mothers, gay mothers, straight mothers, not-quite-sure mothers, surrogate mothers, black mothers, brown mothers, red mothers, pale pink mothers,

pasty complexioned mothers, mothers we wish we had, mothers we wish we had back, fathers and grandfathers who serve as mothers, mothers on bail,

disenfranchised mothers, hospitalized mothers, mothers in nursing homes, and

mothers who take the time

 

 

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In a way, I love them all, mainly because we never appreciate them enough and they never feel they give enough.

I just want them to know that I thought about them for a few special moments, that I wish them well for all they’ve done or hoped to do for us, their babies old and young

 

(c) 2010 A.D. by Jim Reed

Receive Jim’s blast each Tuesday. Ask at jim@jimreedbooks.com

 

HANGIN’ WITH MY PEEPS

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Questions are more important than answers, since we can never be quite sure whether any answer is the right answer. Here are some questions to ponder:

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Can Peeps feel pain? I’m gobbling up (sorry—the chicken joke is already becoming a turkey) several little yellow spongy critters in honor of my secular Easter Day celebration. Yum!

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Which statement is an exaggeration? 1. I always exaggerate. 2. I never exaggerate. (Any existentialist will smirk at your answer.)

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Just who is Les Miserables and why did they write a book about him?

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If your pet dog is named Gingerly, wouldn’t you just hate it each time your neighbors said, “I see Fred is walking Gingerly these days.”?

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When people say they are getting their affairs in order, isn’t this an incomplete sentence? (What about: “I’m getting my affairs, in order to enjoy myself more.”)

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If your car’s nickname is Sentimental, wouldn’t you feel self-conscious, waxing Sentimental?

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Which sounds more menacing? 1. A time capsule  2. A timed capsule

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How big is ample room?

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Where did I see this sign posted last Saturday? NO PROBATION OR PAROLE PARKING!

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Are there times when you can be wishy but not washy?

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Would a sarcastic old-time golf pro be called Sam Snide?

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Do you know a literary carpenter called James Joist?

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Would this be a great name for a string-bikinied exotic dancer? Fanny Floss

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Would a jaded prima donna be rightfully called Maria Callous?

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Is it more prestigious to be cited or sighted?

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Is it high time we re-invented the wheel?

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Do you think it’s time I placed my brain on hold

 

 

 

 

 

 

(c) 2010 A.D. by Jim Reed

jim@jimreedbooks.com

THE SILENCE OF THE BOOKS

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THE SILENCE OF THE BOOKS

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The Center of the Universe is the only quiet haven, isolated sanctuary, peaceful zone I can find in a world fraught with fear and anger and confusion and chaos.

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The Center of the Universe—that is, Reed Books Antiques and the Museum of Fond Memories and the Library of Thought—is where everybody gets along with each other, where every philosophy and dogma, every political stance and emotion-laden opinion, every immovable object and irresistible force, all co-exist side by side in friendship and disagreement.

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Here at my shop, every extreme, moderate and goofy idea gets equal billing, and we all have a good heated argument and afterwards share tea and crumpets together in a spirit of goodwill and tolerance.

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How can this happen, this meeting of the minds, anywhere else in the world?

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Take a look around the shop. Books featuring every viewpoint imaginable are happily shelved side by side, and nobody complains!

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There’s Henny Youngman and Ernest Hemingway and Abraham Lincoln and Rick Bragg and Plutarch and Joseph Stalin and Thomas Jefferson and  Ann Coulter and Hillary Clinton and Eldridge Cleaver and Nelson Mandela and Chris Rock and Kurt Vonnegut and Socrates and Jon Stewart and Mark Twain and Billy Graham and Michael Moore and Jennifer Flowers and Mother Teresa and the Albert’s Schweitzer and Einstein.

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How come they can all enjoy the peacefulness of a small bookstore at the Center of the Universe, but they can’t in any way agree to cooperate in the world outside these walls?

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Why is it that within the shop these folks lie dangerously near each other in peace?

There’s Anais Nin and Nancy Drew and Harry Potter and Jesus Christ and  the Great’s Catherine and Alexander and Hopalong Cassidy and Superman and Norman Bates and Hannibal Lector and the Judy’s Canova and Garland and the Lucy’s Van Pelt and Ball and the Marx’s Groucho and Karl and the Ferdinand’s King and Bull and the Bull’s Connor and Durham…

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They’re all here, folks, and they are getting along just fine.

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If you want a gentle break from the craziness of a world gone impolite, just wander into the bookstore at the Center of the Universe, have a MoonPie on me, gaze in awe at the only place where the War of the Worlds is not taking place. Then, re-energized, re-awakened, venture forth onto the streets and take some of that peacefulness with you and spread it around.

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Who knows what could come of that?

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Just a thought

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© Jim Reed 2010 A.D.

http://www.jimreedbooks.com